*Should I let my teen attend an old church youth group after changing churches?

Q: We recently started attending a new church. I love the expository preaching style, it is close to our house and is very homeschool friendly (our co-op meets there weekly). We previously attended another church about 30 minutes away that was a bit more charismatic. My son who is almost 16 really loves the youth group at our previous church. It was much larger and has a large group of teens. It is more fellowship and worship based, more “me” centered and less service oriented. The new church is much smaller and doesn’t have the “production capabilities” but is solidly reformed in their teachings. My question is, should I still let my son attend the old church’s youth program since he attends Sunday service at the new church with me? My husband is not a believer so I can’t seek his counsel on this. I don’t want to deter my son from attending youth, he was very active in it previously.

A: A lot of kids throw away youth group and similar groups when they get to college because they dont have the me focused culture of being catered to anymore. He should stay in the new church and get solid in Scripture and faith. This podcast discussion explains and gives guidance for parents on what to ensure theyre focusing on [with what little time they have left] so they remain in The Faith after High School. 


Comment:

My 12 year old felt the same way about the previous church we visited for a while. It was lots of fun, bigger, more more "me" centered. I told him he could go to their Wednesday nights, but had to attend our church (also small, low production, expository, etc) on Sunday's and go to the Bible study and get to know the kids there. He wasn't thrilled at first, but now he doesn't even go to the other church. He saw for himself how different the teaching was and how little substance there was in the teaching at the other church and how differently the kids behaved. He is better off for it.

We allowed him to keep a few of the friendships from the old church (after vetting them and their family) but he mostly talks to those ones through our family social media accounts (FB etc) with monitoring and 2 of them come over to hang out at our home sometimes.  But he has new friendships from the homeschool group and the new church. He will be better off for it in the long run. Esp since the church is Christ focused and not me focused.


Related Resources
Guidance for parents with kids & teens
Parent Resources
Believers Resources


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