Help conquering Weed

Q: Weed

Before my husband & I got saved we smoked alot of weed; it was easier for me to stop but it's still been a strong hold for him. Last year, a year after we got married, we fell into temptation again, but I felt convicted everytime - that eventually I told him we need to get rid of this and seek counsel at our church, which we did, and then since that time we didn't go back. Two weeks ago (my birthday) we went out for dinner and my one friend who was with us invited us over, so we went to hang out. She took out weed but didn't offer us because she knows that we do not smoke.

Well that tempted us, and we ended up taking a drag of it. I was coughing my lungs out I immediately felt the shift from in the atmosphere. I repented... and the next day I was telling my husband how the experience made me feel etc. And for the next few days I was talking to him about it, but he didn't comment much. Last night before I went to shower I felt maybe my husband smoked again after that night...  so when I got out the shower I went up to him and tried kissing him (because I usually just randomly do that) and he shyed away and said no -so that confirmed it to me. After he went to shower I looked in his work bag, and I then found another in bag there with weed 😭.  I was fuming because I asked him prior to this and he lied and said no so I was like 🤷‍♀️.  but the Holy Spirit led me to be gentle and not hard on him (because it is a literal fight he is facing) and I should be supportive.

I'm just hurt that he didn't feel comfortable telling me. He said he felt ashamed, but like I'm he's wife why would he feel like that...thoughts? Encouragement?  prayers 🙏

A: Fortunately for believers Christ is with us. And God is gracious and patient as he works to perfect us.. Actively strive to daily grow in righteousness and you will. 

Philippians 1:6 says
“For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus" 😊

Believers can fall into sin. But we do conquer it and kill it. Put more active intentionality into it and you can have Victory over it. 
"For a righteous man may fall seven times and rise again, But the wicked shall fall by calamity." Proverbs 24:16

I would go through this counsel with him  and as you are continue being loving, patient and grace filled as you help him (how you can). Encourage him to spend time in prayer and Scripture with the purpose to redirect himself to living rightly before God ...so he can rightly be the leader of the home and spiritual leader God calls him to be. 🫂✝️💜

And so he doesnt need to be ashamed (in the way that leads him to hide it from you). You should both instead decide together to come to each other with your struggles and so you can come along side and help each other. Plus you can pray and read the Word together. This is such a big blessing in a godly marriage. 

While working to conquer this area, do avoid people and places where temptation for it exists. If your friend isnt saved it is good to avoid till this is conquered. On rare occasions you can meet up in smoke free public place (but not elsewhere) - that will help prevent temptation and sin. And have him surround himself with godly men at church (such as mature believers from the mens group) and the pastor to all together help actively hold him accountable, so he can conquer this💪. Once it is conquered he has victory over it and it no longer has any draw for him. He is dead to it. And it will never be an issue again.

God be with you!

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