Life problems, husband drowning in video games & neglecting family
Q:My husband isn't working, and is getting addicted to video games and I'm slowly seeing him relapse. He is a sweet man, but due to our hard circumstances he's gone back to video games as a distraction, and I am losing my husband to this again.
I see him slowly losing interest in church again, and staying up late to a point he gets up at 5-6 pm. If I try to wake up him early he'll get snappy at me and tell me he can make his own decisions, and gaslights me as if I'm controlling him. Hes also refused counseling. Need prayers and suggestions.
A: Not everyone who clains to be saved is. Some are new or weak believers, but the fact that it's happened before both about church and games, shows somethings spiritually wrong with him. And that needs addressing, even if not from you. Based on how he spoke to you it sounds like it needs to come from others. He's not respecting you or valuing your counsel.
Gaming, likd porn, is the growing addictive drug of today. The gaming makes a dopamine addiction so they feel really depressed without the dopamine hit. He could replace it with a 🏃♂️ run every day, and you both could do that together in am.
The circumstances hes facing right now clearly is the time when he should be seeking God and staying close to Him - when he has problems. Scripture is where he will get God's counsel, and among godly believers in the church. If he's doing his own thing, it's a problem. You don't put God on the backburner till things go well. Life is full of troubles. God helps us through them.
He should have close friends among the godly men at church, if not it's a red flag. Even if he doesnt, you should contact the godly men at church who can come over and rally around him, (about all these issues). Find some at Pastors recommendation from the mens group & let them come alongside him to actively minister to him, to call him to examine his salvation & call him to holy living, and to be the leader at home he's to be. That means inviting them over. You can also do the same for pastoral counseling.
He's neglecting the family and his responsibilities. If necessary to kill sins he needs to throw out the entire video games, permanently (& redierct his life and priorities to God). Let church discipline begin if he isn't correcting and going the righteous path. His sinful behavior has to be brought out to the light and exposed so he is confronted, changes & takes action. That can't happen behind closed doors.
God bless.
Related
Self Examination helps for him
Verses to meditate on:
Proverbs 13:20: "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm."
Ecclesiastes 7:12: "For wisdom is a defense
Matthew 10:16 "Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves. Therefore be wise as serpents and harmless as doves."
Spouse Verses:
Colossians 2:6-8 reminds us:
"Therefore as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, having been firmly rooted and now being built up in Him and established in your faith, just as you were instructed, and overflowing with gratitude.See to it that no one takes you captive through philosophy and empty deception, according to the tradition of men, according to the elementary principles of the world, rather than according to Christ."
And these
Titus 2:4-5
4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children,
5 to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
Proverbs 18:22
22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing
And obtains favor from the Lord.
Proverbs 31:10-12
10 An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil All the days of her life.
Titus 2:4-5
4 ... urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
1 Peter 3:3-4
3 Your adornment must not be merely external... but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.
Proverbs 12:4
4 An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, But she who shames him is like rottenness in his bones.
Proverbs 18:22
22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing
And obtains favor from the Lord.
These verses collectively emphasize the value, trustworthiness, and moral character of a godly wife, highlighting her role in supporting and enriching her husband's life.
1 Corinthians 7:12-14
12 ... if any brother has an unbelieving wife, and she consents to live with him, he must not divorce her. And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away. For the unbelieving husband is sanctified through his believing wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified through her believing husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.
1 Peter 3:1-2
In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.
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