False Convert/ Afraid not right with God
Q: I'm ashamed to admit that I've never taken God seriously. I'm 55 and have lived a life full of sin with no remorse, regret or sorrow. I realize now that I have a reprobate mind and I seared my conscience to have done the things in life I have done in life. I even had called myself a Christian which makes things worse. Nine months ago I had a full on panic attack out of the blue, which required me having to call 911. I told the dispatcher that Satan was in my head. When they arrived I begged the police officer to shoot me. They strapped me down in the ambulance and all I can remember is thinking the words "do you feel worthy of the Kingdom of heaven" and there I cried out to God saying I'm sorry over and over again. After that I was spiritually attacked and thought of suicide for 3 days. I've been in a mental hospital twice now, since then. I am a shell of a man riddled with fear and anxiety. My saving grace is that he removed my desire for sexual sin...