CounselingChristians

Q: My boyfriend & I broke up. We were together a year, (I know not long but I thought he was the one). We broke up 2 days ago and I am struggling… this isn’t my first heartbreak but this is my first one in a really long time (as I stayed single for 5 years before getting back into a relationship because I did not want to go through this and well here I am).  I can use prayers and advice to make this easier for me. I cannot stop thinking about him, & want to reach out. But I know that’s not the right thing to do (my flesh is testing me).  Also, I have kids from a previous relationship and they adored him, so not only am I heartbroken, but once they find out, theyll be hurt. How to move on? A: This can help you all move forward. Regarding the break up *Commenter noted it also helped for a friendship break up, so if theyre old enough, show this to them to help them too. It is a break away for them too, as theres now no contact anymore with him, for them too.  As to y...

Q: Need suggestions regards of myself and my own healing as I’m soon to be 28 and I have zero friends, no job and am disappointed in life.  I have friends from high school or middle school and I don’t keep in contact as they started their own lives or I’m always put on the back burner or they just moved away and had their own lives. It’s been 10+ years since I had a female (same sex) friend seems like after I got a relationship the timing wasn’t good or he would disapprove of. Or they wouldn’t stick and end up treating me horrible such as A. Being my friend and stealing B. Being a friend and trying to get with my partner. Or C both. Either way I haven’t had the best situation with getting or having friends within my adult years!  It’s been very rough. I feel such regret and pain even hate and jealousy which I know isn’t what a person should be. I just don’t know how to to deal with I had a kid after a great job and lost it (was fired for maternity leave) and I felt that was ...

Q: Should we consider our kids missionaries sent unto the world to be the light, such as sending thrm to public schools?  A: No. Parents who think like this arent thinking from a child's level, and dont understand real spiritual warfare. Kids and teens [even college age] are highly impressionable & thus easily led astray by peer pressure or athiestic teachers deception. The kid is probably not even saved, and if by chance they are, theyre not mature enough, nor know Scripture deep enough, and are not equipped to do missionary work.  "I want to give my kids chances to be missionaries" is the worst argument made by Christian parents sending their kids to Caesar. And that's saying a lot.  And it's often said about children who couldn't clearly share the gospel or otherwise defend their faith if their life depended on it. - Pastor Mike Stone  Kids: salt and light in public schools? What parents need to know . Train them up at home, so when theyre older they wo...

God brings his human creations into this world in his timing, generation after generations. This explains further and has a good video link, to address it. If you remain single forever [includes no dating] then you can remain childless. The focus on singleness is to serve God.  If you marry, unless God closes your womb, by God's design, it is expected he will send humans into the world thru you, and it will be a gift and blessing (which he gives you to be good stewards of, and expects you to raise em up in the Lord). Hope that helps.  Related faq Guidance if not wanting Kids What if I don't want kids Resources for Believers

On not wanting kids in today's world Q: I’m confused. I’ve been back and forth between Protestant beliefs and Catholic beliefs and the one main difference that I’ve come across is the opinion on birth control in married relationships. It’s confusing me and stressing me out.  I’ve never felt called to have kids, but I’m in a 5+ year relationship with someone who I’d like to marry one day. I’m only 23 and he’s a year younger. Neither of us are in a position to get married right now due to life circumstances. We are not financially well off and I’ve been struggling with unemployment. Both of us still live at home with our parents.  Catholic and Christians believe that in order for a marriage to be valid, both parties need to be open to having kids. They believe that condoms and birth control pills are sinful because it doesn’t leave room for God’s will to be done. Protestants Ive talked to seem more open and lenient about the usage of contraceptives, but I'm not sure. I’ve read ...

Q: I could really use some prayers and also advice. My husband and I have been married for 20 years. We are 49 (him) and 48 (me). He might be on the autism perspective but not sure if that affects any of this. We struggled with infertility and went through treatments, but I was never able to bring a baby to term. We ended up adopting 3 teenager girls (sisters) through foster care, and to be completely honest, it has been a nightmare. The girls are now 21, 19 and 16. The only one we have a good relationship with is the 16 year old and we are completely estranged from the 19 year old. My husband has always struggled with depression and feeling like he is not close to anyone. I have tried for years to connect with him, but he says he never feels like I try, that I am cold, unemotional, etc. I don't feel like I am, but I am a reserved person. Maybe he is right and I don't show emotions enough, but this is not something that I have ever heard from anyone else in my life. We have no...

Feel need to move church for kids & better opportunities Q: How do you know if it’s time to move to other church? I’m on the position feeling like I need to move on to another church. But I’m stuck on the situation where I feel like they’re my family and I owe them a lot because my Pastor always there for me and my family through ups and downs. But having my own kids, and Sunday school is lacking, and many more things, I feel like leaving. I don’t know what to do aside from praying and asking God. I feel bad leaving my church family but i also love my family especially my kids who need to be taught and meet other kids at their age group. Any advice? Thank you. A: Most churches have 75 members and few kids. Church is not a place for whats happening in many of them today (fun games& activities) but to learn and grow in holiness, to worship God, and serve God as we serve the brethren there.  If theyre teaching biblical Essentials and you agree with their secondary teachings, ...

How do I get my kids to get along? They are 10 (girl) and 13 (boy). They feed off of annoying each other. I ask them over and over to stop but they don’t listen until I yell. They are constantly bickering. I bought a Bible study about loving your siblings from Not Consumed. I thought it would help but they just laugh about it and don’t want to do it. I am at my wits end.  Is it too late to get them to be nice to each other? A: We live in a sin stained world with unsaved kids at home right? The only thing that can help is model righteousness, behavior that God wants them to learn (or that restrains them as we train then up) and to share the Gospel. God does the transforming. Until then they will only do moral things when it benefits them, and will do self [sin nature] things the rest of the time. * if this is a two parent home and your husband is saved, it is good for him as authority in the home to begin a (mandatory) daily family worship hour where they learn the Bible and princi...