Guiding a college bound relative

I have a nephew who is going into his senior year of high school. He has expressed wanting to go to college out of state. He lives in a nearby State with his family, and my husband and kids are in in a big house.  We have already told him that he would be welcome to come live with us to attend a local college (we are in an area where there’s lots to choose from).

In a recent conversation, we found out that his family has been “too busy” for church and they haven’t been attending for some time, so much so that he and his siblings no longer know if they believe in Christianity. This hurts my heart because my brother is strongly Christian in his beliefs. But his wife isn’t, and I guess with the lack if his leadership in the home, she hasnt grown stronger in her faith, and overall that and some complacency seems to have contributed to this affecting their children.

My question is this- I had the thought of making it a requirement that he goes to church with us. He can live here for free, but we would have a church requirement in the deal.

He is a descent kid, he does have a history of church - and sees it overall as a good thing. He always attends with the family when we’re all together for visits.

Thoughts?

A: It appears your brother has made other things a priority in life, over God, and by doing so is failing his family and failing as the spiritual leadership role & ministry that God gave him in his home [to raise up children in Christ]. A daily family worship hour should be a very basic in the Christian home. When there isnt one... everyone strays. If Dad strays the family falls. Their faith isnt fully developed yet, and if he is straying now... he needs a net to catch him. Young people need essentials, foundations and solidifying their beliefs...so they can get saved and nothing in life, nor any deciever can shake them. And church fails them as do families who are not living fir the Lord. 

If he moves in with you, I would impart the most important things young people need to know about Christianity, and esp since at College they decieve to tear ones faith apart.

I do hope these can be of help...

1. Def have him go to adult Sunday school and adult worship. [Youth group today barely ever teaches anything of value at most churches. Avoid the youth groups].

2. Def have a family Bible hour daily.
Figure out what you would do during that time. If your husband is Christian, have him lead it.
>Go over most important areas in Scripture he needs to grasp, and what is related to right living. Point to Christianity not being about moralism or legalism, but for the inner person living in righteousness and in having a right relationship with God.
> Go thru the below. And allow for his questions.

3. What is the Gospel (short video)

4. The Important First Things
>What are the Essentials
* make sure he really grasps these. 

> Foundational matters

5. Focus on areas schools will try to decieve about.
Go thru these with him...

> Biblical Reliability & Science ⭐

> Protect from Deceiving professors

>Frequent questions by those who struggle to understand basic & important things about the faith. 

6. Good "podcasts" to listen to in the car going anywhere. Spotify has em. (They have good videos on yt too.)
* LivingWaters.com
*Wretched.org
*Cold Case Christianity [see yt vids playlists for many faq kinds]

The good thing about podcasts is you can scroll around and pick out topics you want them to hear.

 
For now pick the most important ones, knowing time is a limited factor with you in his daily life. Let him browse other episodes (after college graduation) on his own.

Utilize every opportunity in the car, going anywhere, and def to and from church 🙂. Some folk have 30 min drives. Just que up the podcast to the actual start of the epolisode. LW topics starts around 6 to 12 minutes in so just save time and jump to it, if your church is closer to home. 

7. Bible books for him to read through

Genesis 1-11, John, Romans, Ephesians.

Numbers One and Two above need to be part of the deal for living there. You are providing a room and food and family. And so these are not too much to ask. [Along with picking up after himself, (as part of becoming an adult he needs responsibilities), and there needs a reasonable curfew or calling you rules; you cant be constantly concerned someones breaking in at 2am - you have your children there and family safety to also consider].

I will say that... if by chance he wont embrace truth/Christianity now, by the time he gets his diploma - you helped "train him up" [planting seeds/watering what he had already grasped]. And it is all you can do. Invest in him. Then be prayerful he will get saved at some point in his life [& then you can rejoice, praise & glorify God when he does].

If he reembraces it because he is learning and more of it is making sense, then the above can help solidify his faith and he might get saved while living with you, and it will be a firm foundation on which no one can destroy. 

>>> also, make sure he has a general understanding that there are many "people" out there who not only claim to be believers but "groups and religions" that falsely masqurade as Christian too. Those are among the ones he'll run into on campus or even in groups there that "claim" to be Christian.

A deeper study on world religions and cults would be needed for him to grasp that better, but having a general awareness of it can help him generally to just steer clear of anyone not in a conservative denomination [like his own] until he is more mature in the faith.

This is why grasping the essentials really well, and understanding the Gospel, will be vital to him. 

God bless

When he graduates you can gift him a MacArthur study Bible and the world religions book.