When spouse sins and you feel trust is gone, how to move past it?

Q: My husband has in the past looked at girls on social media. He deleted both for now, but did mention he was planning to go back on Facebook and I lost it and said no. [You lost those privileges when you looked at other women like 17 women]. 

*Once I caught him looking at a girl in a bikini and zooming in. I flipped, but eventually moved past it. Fast forward fo a few months ago where I felt like I should look at his acct. I never really do that. So I pulled it up and in the search bar were a bunch of girls names. He said it all started with him looking at some guy’s reel and then just went down a rabbit hole, but swore he didn’t look these girls up and doesn’t even know their names. It was awful.

I feel like in a sort of depression now. I have started to work out as i feel insecure about my weight now. I know he is attracted to me he flirts with me and does make me feel wanted. 

He said he doesn’t watch porn and has repented. He got an app called accountable2you which sends me reports and helps hold him accountable. He reached out to some guy at church to hold him accountable too, but he hardly talks to him. It’s here and there. 

But I cannot like cannot get the images of those girls out of my head. He goes to the gym nightly which before wasn’t a problem. Now when he’s gone I obsess over it. I ask him how many girls were at the gym etc. he’s really sick of hearing it. 

Also, I tell him I want his attention because I feel depressed and lonely and just feel really depleted because I’m a mom of 3 children. I feel like I do so much and give everyone everything, but also don’t feel like I am appreciated even though he says I am. He will say things that make me feel otherwise. 

I don’t think this is grounds for divorce, but I just don’t think I’m ever gonna trust him again. He ruined me. I don’t know where to go from here honestly. It’s affecting my whole life. I’m angry with him and my kids and take it out on them. 

I’m not feeling like a good mother lately because I’m low energy and just have nothing left to give. Every time I bring it up or ask him questions he shuts down and won’t answer. He says he’s just over it. He’s moved on and repented and God forgives him & I need to too, and it’s on me that I’m miserable. So then he just goes silent and won’t answer anything after that. Which makes me feel very unloved and not cared for. How do I move past this?

A: Idk if he is a false convert sounds like he is conquering these sins. Regardless the resources here might really help you. Just walk and live in grace. 

Faq here go over verses and note how to live before your husband. There's regular marriage helps there too. 

This can be a real help too, in moving past the things in the past. 

Plus, Memorize scripture and trust God is in control, your peace is to be in Him, and trust that God is going to grow you both in the Faith. Regardless YOU keep your eyes on Jesus 🫂🙏✝️ 😊.

Here are some additional helps so you can conquer specific thought and behavior sins, so you can live right mindedly in righteousness. And bring restoration and peace to your relationship again. 

Forgiveness is a grace and love covers a multitude of sins, so be like Christ, and also leave the worries and concerns in God's hands. Regardless of the future He holds it and controls it, and if (in a long shot) your world crumbles ...Jesus is still there and will see you thru to a better future. Keep your heart eyes and mind on Him day by day. 

🙏Prayers you will overcome this & have a God honoring blessed marriage. 

* If theres a situation where he falls into that sin again, that counseling resource will be a go to place to help him conquer it.  (*So bookmark this page so you can utilize it then, and for yourself now). 

God bless